Flat Note
by Torp
Summary: Akaba's guitar won't stay in tune, which results in terrible consequences for the Bando Spiders.


Disclaimer: I don't own Akaba, Kotaro, or Eyeshield 21. Isn't it great?

Notes: You know, it's sad that when I think of Eyeshield 21 I immediately think of Akaba instead of Sena. Something is wrong with that. Concept conceived while a friend and I were at our school football game, and we were wondering why the anime made Akaba's eyeshield BLUE as opposed to, you know, RED. Sorry if my guitar terms are off, but I don't feel like looking it up. Also, sorry for making Akaba so OOC. Also, I think I made Kotaro a little OOC, too… oh well.

**Flat Note**

Or,

_In which Akaba impersonates Jimmy Hendrix, and Kotaro tries to comb his hair with a tuning fork._

It was just a normal afternoon for the football team from Bando High School. The Spiders were practicing diligently for their upcoming football games, all except for two notable members who were sitting on a bench on the sidelines. These two people where Sasaki Kotaro and Akaba Hayato, and both were sitting out this practice for different reasons. Akaba, who was mindlessly strumming chords on his ever present guitar, was _so much_ of a better player than his teammates that it discouraged them to practice with him. That's just the kind of thing you have you go through when you're as awesome as Akaba. Kotaro was sitting out because he was a kicker, and when is a kicker ever needed on the field besides to kick? Besides, he already had 100 percent accuracy, and you can't really get much better than that (except to be able to kick the ball through the goalpost from the 60-yard line, but that's beside the point).

"Damn that Musashi!" Kotaro shouted as he thought about how he couldn't kick the ball through the goalpost from the 60-yard line. He ran his fine-toothed comb through his hair for the third time that minute, which greatly annoyed Akaba. Actually, Kotaro's random outburst and obsession with the kicker from Deimon Devil Bats also greatly annoyed Akaba. He shot a glare out of the corner of his eye at his teammate while he played a few particularly angry-sounding notes, but the kicker was oblivious. "Damn that 60-yard Magnum!"

"You know, you've never actually see him kick the ball from the 60-yard line, have you?" Akaba said airily as he began to pluck the melody of a song he'd heard once. He got midway through the introduction, when he heard something odd. Akaba stopped playing, and plucked his A string. _Twang. _Akaba flinched. The note was incredibly flat.

As his hand flew to the tuning keys, he barely heard Kotaro's response. "No, I haven't actually _seen_ it, but what if he can kick it in from there?" Kotaro started combing his hair furiously as his answer started to spin into a rant. "I can only kick it in from the 50-yard line, so it makes me look bad if that Musashi can kick it in from the 60-yard line! The difference is 10 yards! That's a whole first down! It makes me look bad if I can't even make up a distance of 10 yards!" Kotaro stood up and made a cool pose, shouting, "And looking bad is NOT SMART!"

"Hey Kotaro…" Akaba said, furrowing his brow. "Could you shut up for just a second? I'm trying to tune my guitar."

"Tch." Kotaro sat back down on the bench and glanced at Akaba's guitar. "Why don't you stop playing that thing for just a second so that I can talk?"

"Because tuning my guitar will _only_ take a second. You're talking could last hours." Akaba plucked the string a few times as he turned the tuning key. The sound made a noticeable change, but Akaba kept on turning. "Does this note sound flat to you? It won't get sharper…"

"I could tell you if I knew what flat sounded like." Kotaro said flatly, kicked the ground with the toe of his shoe . "Or if I knew what flat meant, for that matter."

"Flat sounds like what the note sounds like right now." Akaba sighed, running a hand through his hair. He was a little shocked that Kotaro didn't know what flat meant. Everyone in the world knew what flat meant! Or so Akaba thought. But he had finally got his string tuned, so it didn't really matter anymore, anyway. He began to play a song, and twitched when his A string made the same sound as before. _Twang_. "Damn…"

"Maybe you're just playing it wrong." Kotaro _yet again_ started to comb his hair, but Akaba reached out, snatching the comb away. He glares with his red eyes at Kotaro as he snapped the comb in two and threw the pieces onto the football field. Then he turned and pointed a stern finger at the kicker.

"Never, EVER say that to me again."

As the genius tight end returned his attention to perfecting the sound of his guitar, Kotaro just stared. He would have punched Akaba for breaking his comb (his _favorite_ comb, no less), but what Akaba did just then was _seriously_ frightening. The Spider's kicker decided that he should try to redeem himself to his teammate as opposed to starting a fistfight with him (a fight which he would ultimately lose, anyway). "So," He said, trying his best to sound interested, "What note is it again?"

"A" Akaba responded shortly. He was turning the key violently now, and Kotaro couldn't help but think that it was bad for the strings. Then, he remembered something. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a tuning fork.

"Hey, Akaba," He said waving the fork in front of Akaba's face, "You gave me this tuning fork yesterday, remember? You said you didn't need it, and look! It has a little 'A' on it! Isn't that convenient?"

But Akaba only ignored him. "Flat, flat, flat, flat…" he muttered, brow furrowed, swiftly strumming and tuning. "Why is it still flat!"

"Tch. Fine. Don't accept my help." Kotaro rolled his eyes and focused his attention on his team's practice like a good football player. Maybe it was absentmindedness, or maybe by force of habit, but the kicker found an excellent substitute for his comb in the tuning fork. He began combing again, and all was right with the world.

Or, it was for Kotaro. It was quite a different story for Akaba Hayato, who was beginning to get very, very, _very_ angry (as opposed to just very, very angry as he was a moment ago). _Twang, twang, twang, twang, twang _went the guitar. The sound grated on Akaba's last nerve. It was so impossibly flat! It couldn't _possibly_ be any more flat, even though the string couldn't _possibly _get any more taught. "Flat, flat, flat, flat, flat, flat, flat!" Akaba yelled, gathering stares from his team, who'd stopped practicing when they'd heard their ace's outburst. The tight end's fury was quickly rising, and, just as quickly, his irises began to turn the same color red as his contact lenses (_and _hair, _and_ sunglasses, _and _eyeshield, _and _football uniform…). Suddenly, the guitar emitted a new sound, _twing,_ and Akaba snapped. A vein popped on his forehead, and he let out an aura of pure, unfiltered rage. "ARGH! NOW IT'S TOO SHARP!"

He put both hands on the neck of his instrument and _hurled_ it at the ground. As expected, it broke, but Akaba didn't stop there. He angrily grabbed the nearby convenient gallon of gasoline and poured it all over the pieces of his beloved guitar. Then, he pulled out a lighter, lit it, and dropped it into the mess.

"What the hell are you doing!" Kotaro shouted, jumping up and backing away as the gasoline ignited. Akaba just stood there like a statue, staring at his burning instrument. A few of the Spiders ran off to get water, and Kotaro took it upon himself to rescue his teammate from a fiery death. And by rescue, I mean that he kicked his teammate in the head and dragged him to safety. When they were a good distance away from the flames, Kotaro kicked Akaba again for good measure. "Are you crazy or something? You didn't have to go and do that!"

"It wouldn't tune." Akaba said, shrugging. He appeared to be back to normal.

"That doesn't mean you have to burn it!" Kotaro shouted, throwing his hands up for emphasis. He pointed to the football field, a good half of which was now on fire. "We won't be able to practice now because of you!"

"You mean _they_ won't be able to practice now.' Akaba retorted, pulling _another_ guitar out of literal nowhere. He strummed a few more notes as Kotaro considered his logic, but he stopped as he heard a particularly strange sound. _Twang. _"Hey Kotaro, does this note sound flat to you…?


End file.
